"Nor Height, Nor Depth, Nor Any Other Creature, Shall Be Able To Separate Us From The Love Of God, Which Is In Christ Jesus Our Lord."
Loving God should never feel like a chore.
It isn't something you do just because you have nothing better to do.
The love you feel is different than the love you have for your spouse or your child.
It is an all-consuming, fire breathing, passionate love that is extremely hard to explain.
You see your spouse, kids, family members, friends...
You can touch them, hug them, hold hands with them, kiss them...
You can't do that with God in the conventional way.
But you can feel it, you can feel His love for you in every fiber of your being.
You feel it in the lyrics of a song, a passage in the Bible, a breeze in your hair, a raindrop on your face, the sun shining down.
You feel it in your deepest sorrow and your most ecstatic joy.
You feel it on the most quietest of nights and the noisiest of days.
You feel it when you are alone and when you are in a crowd of people.
You feel it when you are sitting in Church and when you are sitting at home.
A complete peace, a calmness so still you can't help but smile, a love that transcends through time and space.
A love that will lift you so high you will feel like you are soaring, nothing and no one can touch you or hurt you or shame you.
A perfect, unconditional love, that is how He loves you.
How do you love Him?
How do you show Him the love you have inside of you?
Do you shield the love you have for Him from others, afraid that they may make fun of you?
Afraid they may call you names or think ill of you?
There is a passage in the Bible - Matthew 10:33 that says: "But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in Heaven."
Imagine yourself standing before Him on judgement day, the look of disappointment on His face at the fact that you were to worried about how others would see you, instead of how He sees you.
Have no fear, I did it as well when I first started my walk, and there are some days I catch myself still in that awful cycle.
My life was based on what others always thought of me, my happiness, my self-worth depended on it...
If someone didn't like me, I went out of my way to find out why and once I had the answer, I would move Heaven and Earth to get that person to like me.
Nothing made me more upset than knowing someone didn't like me.
When I started on this journey, those fears were still in place.
As each day passed, I would feel this indescribable love growing within me, yet I didn't know how to get it out.
I would see people worshipping in Church, hands raised towards the Heavens, standing and clapping, tears pouring forth etc....
I couldn't bring myself to lose my self-control, I couldn't allow someone to see me worshipping and praising in the matter which I was being moved to do.
I felt like a fraud, knowing what I know, having done what I have done.
The number one reason I fought the calling to be a Pastor is because of what I have done in my past...
I kept thinking I wasn't good enough to preach His word.
I was a sinner of epic proportions, a loser in the eyes of quite a few people and a person who had zero business behind a pulpit.
However, I read passages that spoke to me, I shared my fears, I prayed, I learned (and am still learning).
Each day He was merciful enough to wake me, I took advantage of it...
I had to fight to not allow myself to succumb to depression, to not despair over my circumstances, to not hate others for what has been done, to not wallow in self-pity.
It hasn't been easy and there are still days when I fall back a few steps, there are days I still land on my rear, however He is still there, with His hand raised towards me, showing me each day how loved I am.
So this past Sunday, I stepped out of my comfort zone, I stood when I felt moved to do so, I clapped, I was even dancing a little bit...
I needed Him to know I love Him, to show Him I was happy to be in His house worshipping.
I smiled, I shed a few tears and I went to the Altar and thanked Him for the previous week...
It wasn't a great week, yet I survived.
I survived because of Him, because of His love for me.
Nothing Can Separate Me
From The Grace That You Gave Free
I Know You'll Never Let Me Go
Even Though You Know My Frailties
Every Single Thing About Me
You Show The Greatest Love That's Known