The Phoenix Rises...

The phoenix is a mythical bird...

According to legend, it has a 500-1000 year life cycle...

Near the end of the life cycle, the bird builds itself a nest out of twigs that then ignites...

Both nest & bird burn fiercely and are reduced to ashes, from which a new young phoenix or phoenix egg arises, reborn anew to live again.

The new phoenix is destined to live as long as its old self...

In Chinese mythology, the phoenix is a symbol of high virtue & grace, of power & prosperity...

Think about that for a minute...

It is a beautiful analogy for all of our lives...

We have all been burned - Some more then others...

However each of us continues to rise from the ashes...

Sure we may fall and there are days when there isn't a hand in sight to help us up...

I have fallen and gotten up more times then I care to count...

There are some days when I feel like I am drowning and there is no land in sight...

Like a candle in a hurricane (as Rascal Flatts puts it)...

These are the days that I look back on with pride...

I am stronger today then I ever thought possible...

I am doing new things that I never thought I could do...

I have new/old friends that I adore...

I am becoming happy and for so long I never thought that would return to me...

I didn't stay in the ashes and suffocate...

Like the phoenix, I rose, spread my wings and now I am soaring...

Can you guess where this is?

I am going on a vacation by myself...

This is where I am going for 4 days next month

I will be leaving on Halloween...

I have never gone anywhere by myself as you all know and this opportunity has presented itself in the form of a working vacation...

2 of the 4 days that I will be there will be filled with meetings and conferences...

I am nervous and maybe a little scared but I am going to do this...

I have things I need to prove to myself and this is a good place to start...

I need to find balance within myself and the 2 days I won't be working, I will be alone, on an intense soul searching mission...

If any of you know what I do for a living, then it won't be to hard to figure out where I am going :)

CREED (new song "Rain" released today whoo-hoo!)

I Feel It's Gonna Rain Like This For Days

So Let It Rain Down And Wash Everything Away

I Hope That Tomorrow The Sun Will Shine

With Every Tomorrow Comes Another Life

Previous Post/Chips vs Pringles

I need to say one thing about this post...

These (chips vs pringles) weren't my thoughts nor was this my analogy...

This is how my Pastor put it...

Not saying I agree or disagree, I just wanted to share...

Nikki - I am with you...

Because it is all new to me as well, I struggle daily - I think that is where faith steps in...

Faith is believing in something you can't see...

MLK said it best - Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.

(((Hugs))) to you all.

P.S. Did I tell you all my cat came home?

Chips vs Pringles

Hope all is well with my friends today...

All is the same on the marriage front so no need to post anything about that...

I have missed the opportunity to see Creed on 3 separate occasions - So bummed...

My Cowboys lost last night in the last 4 seconds of the game - So bummed...

I did something abnormal for me and got a little plastered on Friday night...

I drank to many kamikazes but had a really fun time...

I have been sitting home for the last 10 weeks pining away for a man who obviously doesn't want me and it was time to go out and let my hair down...

I went out with my Mom and Sister and met up with some friends...

I need some real life friends and I need to get a life though alcohol shouldn't be involved in that...

I went out Saturday however limited my drinking this time...

I went to Church Sunday...

I am now at work...

You are probably wondering why there is a bag of chips and a can of Pringles on my blog...

Well I am about to tell you...

The sermon at Church yesterday was about checking your ego...

I learned that your ego will get in the way of your real relationship with God...

I learned that your ego will stand in the way of your learning...

I learned that your ego brings about fear and shame...

I learned my ego is to big and it isn't always about "me"...

I learned "letting go" is so much easier said then done...

I also learned I want to be like a can of Pringles and not a bag of chips.

As told by my Pastor...

People are either like a bag of potato chips or they are like a can of Pringles...

Being a believer then you would be a can of Pringles...

Being a non-believer then you would be a bag of chips...

As a non-believer, (therefore a bag of chips), you are mostly full of air when opened or confronted...

There is some substance in there however not much...

If you take a bag of chips and repeatedly throw it against the wall, the contents will break apart and crumble...

Same with your life and the hell you may be going through...

It will break you apart and crumble you...



As a believer, (therefore a can of Pringles), you are full of the Holy Spirit...

No matter which end is opened, it is completely full...

You can repeatedly throw a can against the wall and the contents will still be fine upon opening...

Same with your life and the hell you may be going through...

You are protected by angels and you can't break...

I want to be the can of Pringles...

I want to know that no matter what I encounter in life, I will be encased by angels who will protect me...

It is very hard for me to let this take over completely because of the hurt I have experienced in the last few months...

I have been doing a lot of thinking and soul-searching and while my beliefs in divorce haven't changed, what I want in a relationship has...

I want a man who isn't ashamed to announce his love to me no matter where the place...

I want a man who will hold me when I cry and isn't ashamed to shed a few tears either...

I want a man who is affectionate, one who doesn't walk ahead of me in public, one who is right beside me holding my hand...

I want a man who will fight for what he believes in and not run at the first sign of trouble...

I want a man who can laugh at life and enjoys life to the fullest...

I want a man who will go to the alter with me and kneel by my side in prayer...

I want a little romance, not just some flowers here and there but true romance, a walk on the beach at night, lying by the fireplace in the nude, dancing in the rain etc...

I want a man who will hold my face, look into my eyes and then kiss me like I am the first and last person he will ever lay eyes on again and that he is ok with that...

I want to know I am the only woman for him and I want him to know he is the only man for me...

I want to be complete in our love, I just don't know if the man I married is that man anymore...

Maybe I have been settling for silver when God is trying to give me gold.

MICHAEL W. SMITH
Sometimes The Journey Makes You Weary
Feels Like A Long & Winding Road
Sometimes This Life Can Lose It's Meaning
But You Might Be Surprised To Find Some Hope
Maybe You're Wondering Where Love Is
You May Feel It's Far Away From Here
Maybe You're Wondering Where I Am
You Might Be Surprised To Find I'm Near